A Long & Narrow Road....

Hello to everyone and please accept my apologies for not updating my blog as I intended.  The 4-5 weeks have been filled with ups and downs...the ups are that my daughter is finally potty trained! Yay!  She starts preschool in September and just finished a week at Vacation Bible School and she absolutely loved it!  Another up is that Matt starts what we call "van camp" in a week or two - he goes all day to an outdoor lake/camp and does all the things we wish we could do when we were little (horseback riding, swimming, canoeing, ropes courses, nature hunts, arts & crafts and of course every sport you can think of --- especially hockey!)  Another up (and we realize we're crazy, but crazy in love at this point) is that on Father's Day, we picked up our 8 week old yellow lab we named Molson (as in Molson Golden Canadian...the beer...seems fitting and my Canadian husband of course loves it).

But with some up's also come some downs...one is that we miss my parents and their help and support. It was a blessing to have them here with us for so many months and we don't know how we would've made it thru without them.  But the biggest down, by far though is something i just found out yesterday with an appointment with my surgeon.  There is a possibility that i will need yet again another surgery.  This would be my 5th back surgery.  Not a track record i'm proud of or boasting about.  As you know, on March 27 i broke my T12 transverse process clear thru left to right thru solid bone.  Solid bone!  The surgeon has no idea how that even happened because that bone is apparently a very big, thick one.  In any event, i somehow broke it...which landed me back in the hospital for 8 days and then inpatient rehab for a month.  I've been wearing this clamshell brace religiously and despite that, the fracture has still not healed.  He said that if it does not heal within the next 2 months, that i will need a complete revision of what he did during my second surgery.  He would have to remove all of the rods and screws he worked so hard to "install" and then extend the fusion up all the way, top to bottom, literally.  He nor I want to have to go thru that again.  It was that second surgery that really put me over the edge last time so the thought of having to do it all again is just too much sometimes.

Like i said when i created this blog, i'm using it as an outlet - sometimes a 'venting to get it out' outlet and sometimes an information outlet for others who just may have go through this at some point.  I try to be upbeat and optimistic but i'm not going to lie - it's a "long and narrow road" and sometimes it just baffles me how much my body if failing me.  I'm doing everything i can but it's still not "listening" (lol)....this fracture HAS TO HEAL - - and if it doesn't, then i will have another surgery. 

SERENITY PRAYER



God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
enjoying one moment at a time;
accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
that I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
forever in the next.
Amen.

Thank you in advance for the continued prayers!